Tag Archives: the bfg

Brought to You by the Big Friendly Network

Last year, we read The BFG by Roald Dahl.  It’s such a great book.  If frobscottle doesn’t make your kids laugh, nothing will.  And if you read it aloud, you get to try to do the queen’s voice.  Hello!

Well, this great work of children’s literature had an unexpected impact on Mushroom and BalletBoy.  From the moment they heard it, everything in their imaginary universe began joining up with the BFG.  It began slowly, but at this point, the Big Friendly Network has taken over everything.  First, the BF Network began sponsoring bathtime, when Mushroom and BalletBoy play some sort of game involving the bath toys.  Next, the BF Network began designing websites.  Carnivals and festivals were started by the BF Company.  They opened a theme park.  The BF Company began selling things.  They opened restaurants, including a healthy fast food chain that is trying to challenge McDonald’s for market dominance.  They came up with the BF Pad, a gaming platform where you can download and play games with friends.  The BF Company started an airline and a bus company to take you wherever you want to go.  Whenever Mushroom and BalletBoy play any type of game, they inevitably tell me that it’s about to become a show on the BF Network, with an accompanying website designed by the BF Company, of course.  The BF Network just started BF Little Kids, a network just for younger viewers.  The Big Friendly Company makes Legos.  They control Star Wars.  They bring you Avatar: The Last Airbender and Phineas and Ferb.

I think they even brought you this blog post.  From what I can tell, the Big Friendly Company is the world’s biggest monopoly on children’s entertainment and products.  It’s like Disney, only maybe even BIGGER, not to mention more creepy sounding.  I mean, is there a more big brother sounding name than the Big Friendly Company?

Does this mean my kids will one day be brilliant businessmen?  Is this the result of my constant media literacy brainwashing that they imagine these massive corporations controlling everything?  Or do they just have some crazy awesome imaginations and do you just never know where they’re going to go?

I have no idea why they put all the early readers on the floor in the shape of a cross. Really, no clue. But I'll bet it had something to do with the Big Friendly Company.